March into My Heart

Patty’s Blog: ChildDrenched

Today’s Drip: National Adoption Month Brings FREE Gifts for Readers

Today’s Drip:  National Adoption Month Brings FREE Gifts for Readers

Posted: November 20th, 2013

November is a very special month and some very special people celebrating their adoption experiences by giving away their incredibly good writing.  Three authors have given away their adoption books so far in honor of National Adoption Month and there are two more still to go. These authors have two things in common:  they have been touched by adoption and they all want to give back for their blessings by sharing their stories of adoption. Many authors have written about adoption but very few have a selfless goal in publishing their stories. The group of authors who are part of this fellowship want those who are struggling with infertility to understand that adoption can be a viable path to completing a family. One author who recently gave away over 4,000 copies of her book, Eye of Adoption, speaks in a way that helps the reader see their own path to adoption, complete with warnings and advice.  Another author offers a practical, helpful guide to adoption in his book 7 Steps to Domestic Infant Adoption.  A third author, offered her book From Pain to Parenthood earlier in the month and hopes to help people who have suffered miscarriages and are contemplating adoption. This coming weekend, Debbie Barrow Michael is offering But the Greatest of These is Love for free.  Her book gives an international side of the adoption story and like the other books, is getting great reviews.  Links to these books will be found at the end of this article. Several(more)

Today’s Drip: Springtime Brought another Adoption

Today’s Drip: Springtime Brought another Adoption

Posted: July 2nd, 2013

As my devoted, adoption blog followers have known for over a year now, my posts about our family dog who passed away last May are emotionally charged for me as the writer and for many readers who share the same love for our canine family members. We seem to all understand that losing the perfect pet is very difficult. The memories of our first family dog growing up with my two now-fully-grown sons will forever be cherished, as will the valuable life lessons my children learned because of him. It’s difficult to deny the benefits of raising children with a devoted, trusted pet in the family. Although the pain of losing our dear yellow Lab, Jasper, has not faded for anyone in my family, especially as TV commercials and YouTube videos seemingly always feature Labradors, we have finally “embarked” on a new adventure with a modified version of our dearly departed canine child. Introducing our newest adopted family member: an apricot-colored Labra-doodle named “Duffy”. His full name is Lord Dufner of Duffington, thanks to my imminently-going-to-college son. Some may wonder why we would want a new puppy if both “boys” will be away at college by the fall. I myself justified remaining dog-less in Seattle for the rest of my life, figuring we had the perfect family pet (except for the shedding) and no dog could ever fill that void or measure up to Jasper. However, as the months went by and the college acceptances arrived, I realized that it was selfish(more)

Today’s Drip: Some Good Fatherly Advice

Today’s Drip: Some Good Fatherly Advice

Posted: June 3rd, 2013

As my eleven-year-old, adopted daughter said “Bye Dad!” and hung up the phone before rushing off to the bus stop for school, it occurred to me how close my husband and daughter have become over the years. He travels often for business and every morning he is away, he calls to sing her a little “Good Morning” tune he made up when she was first born. It’s natural for a father-daughter relationship to thrive, but the remarkable thing is the transformation of my husband, who never thought he needed a third child. I recall my desperate feelings nineteen years ago when, after my second son was born, my husband refused to consider having a third child, even though he knew how much I wanted a daughter. My mother had passed away and losing her was devastating. Our mother-daughter relationship was the most important thing to me. I loved my two sons but I always knew I wanted that same relationship with my own daughter. When my mother died, it made that desire much more intense. It took some time for me to recover from the grief while dealing with an infant and busy toddler, without my mother’s help.  Reaching the milestone of both boys in school full-time was monumental and only then, did I feel ready to raise a third child myself. By then, my husband could see that my dream of a daughter would never fade, even when he tried to fill the void with a puppy. Needless to say,(more)

Today’s Drip: Keeping it All to Yourself May not be Necessary

Today’s Drip: Keeping it All to Yourself May not be Necessary

Posted: May 17th, 2013

Mother’s Day is always bitter sweet for me, and for many others who have either lost their mother, or a child, or who haven’t been able to have their own child. As a mother of three, I feel very blessed. As a woman who lost the person who guided me through my childhood, teen years, college and early professional years, the pain never goes away. My mother eased me through life with all its trials and tribulations, and since her death, I have never been the same. Some mothers provide just the right comforting words and advice at just the right moment, like mine always did. For some women, friends, sisters, or other relatives substitute as that mentoring role model; but for me, there was no one else in the world that could listen to everything that was on my mind and react appropriately. So when I began the journey to have a daughter four years after my mother’s death, I had no one to talk to. At the time, my sons were only ages four and six and I loved them and my husband dearly, but they weren’t capable of listening to my emotional rants about needing a daughter and responding in a helpful way. Through the ups and downs of years trying to have a third biological child and then moving on to adoption, only my husband knew the depth of my despair. He was supportive and encouraging, but as most women know, a man’s tolerance for emotional chatter is(more)

Today’s Drip: Building a Nest in Tennessee, Part 2

Today’s Drip: Building a Nest in Tennessee, Part 2

Posted: May 8th, 2013

In honor of Mother’s Day, a special two-part guest blog by Jody Cantrell Dyer, author of THE EYE OF ADOPTION: The True Story of my Turbulent Wait for a Baby. Part One: Jody was published last week and Part Two: Tobi follows. Thanks to Jody for her thoughtful contribution. My dear friend Tobi found a well-constructed American Robin’s nest (pictured) in her East Tennessee back yard last week. Doesn’t it look like a sweet place to snooze with feathered siblings or gobble down a juicy worm? Like fellow author and blog host Patty and me, Tobi has suffered great loss. Patty lost her precious mother and I lost my father, both at young ages. Tobi survived a horrific house fire in college and spent months recovering from burns and surgeries. Years later, she endured a complete hysterectomy, which made her unable to bear a child. We three mama birds have suffered great loss through tragedy and infertility, but we were and still are determined to fill our nests with baby birds.  Patty has two well-adjusted sons and “the light of her life” in her beautiful daughter. I have my miraculous biological son, Houston, and I brought home my “Smiling Boy Scotty” in 2010. Tobi still anxiously waits for a daughter through adoption. Patty illustrates her longing for a daughter in her poignant memoir, March into My Heart: a Memoir of Mothers, Daughters, and Adoption. I chronicle my trek through the rigors of infertility and adoption in my narrative The Eye of Adoption: The(more)

Today’s Drip: Building a Nest in Tennessee, Part 1

Today’s Drip: Building a Nest in Tennessee, Part 1

Posted: May 2nd, 2013

In honor of Mother’s Day, a special two-part guest blog by Jody Cantrell Dyer, author of THE EYE OF ADOPTION: the true story of my turbulent wait for a baby. Part One: Jody will be published this week and Part Two: Tobi will be published next week. Thanks to Jody for her thoughtful contribution. So, let’s talk about THE NEST. Pregnant women are often teased about nesting. When I was lucky enough to actually be pregnant with my first child, Houston, I scoured every inch of my home with Lysol and bleach. I cooked and froze chicken casseroles and lasagna for my husband and me. I washed and ironed all of Houston’s baby clothes and organized them for efficiency in his dresser and closet. I arranged birth announcements, insurance, and daycare. I even got a manicure and died my hair the day before he was born! In my eight-year wait for a second baby (six years of painful infertility, plus two years of a tumultuous, yet successful adoption journey), I battled self-doubt, financial problems, odd questions from others, and all-consuming worry that I would never have a second child. Doubt is an understandable part of the process. My eleven-year-old son, Houston, loves the 1989 movie "Field of Dreams", in which farmer Ray hears a voice say, “If you build it, he will come.” Despite degradation from townspeople, Ray tirelessly builds a baseball field on his farm, on faith. In music, Martina McBride’s song “Anyway” inspires dreamers to shake off criticism, failure, and(more)

Today’s Drip: The Pain of Infertility Revisited

Today’s Drip:  The Pain of Infertility Revisited

Posted: April 26th, 2013

There are memorable moments in life that strike each of us in a certain way—some are happy moments and others not so much—that may be perceived in a very different way by others, even our closest friends. Since the publication of my book, March into My Heart: a Memoir of Mothers, Daughters, and Adoption, in which I recount my journey, including years of infertility, to have a daughter after losing my beloved mother to cancer, I have been startled by the profound reactions my book has provoked from friends and strangers alike. For me, like many other women, dealing with infertility was devastating and isolating. I was silent about what was happening to me until publishing the book years later. This week alone, I have received lovely posts on Facebook and touching hand-written notes from readers I have never met. I was also brought to tears by some words from one my dearest friends. At lunch this week, she described how guilty she felt after reading my book. She worried that she had been extremely insensitive, so many years ago, talking to me about her own daughters and how wonderful they were. She never understood the pain I had suffered at not being able to conceive a daughter and apologized. “I didn’t even realize I was hurting you; I was a horrible friend!” she said. We were having lunch to celebrate her birthday, which ironically was on April 21st, the first day of National Infertility Awareness Week, which is April 21-27 this year. It(more)

Today’s Drip: Saying the Words Out Loud

Today’s Drip: Saying the Words Out Loud

Posted: April 17th, 2013

How many of us have lost a significant family member and never been the same since? It’s easy to wonder if we’re the only one who has those persistent feelings of loneliness and irreplaceable loss. Last week I received a call from an acquaintance who had just started to read my adoption memoir and was stunned by her own feelings. She had only read through chapter three, and she was taken aback by the detailed account of my mother’s sudden death and the brutal pain I felt from the loss of that incredibly close relationship. My friend, Mary, lost her own mother just 18 months ago and realized that she was feeling all of the feelings I had written about but wasn’t able to articulate them.  Reading my book gave her the courage to reach out to someone who had a similar experience and talk about her loss and the difficulty of it all. Mary told me “I never realized we had so much in common.  My mother was the closest person to me as well and her death has devastated me.”  I was overcome by her feelings and the fact that my story evoked that kind of reaction from someone I hadn’t seen in several years.  We vowed to stay in touch and support each other through those difficult moments when we really need our mothers. The loss of my mother compelled me to search for a daughter through adoption to fill that relationship gap in my life. Writing and publishing my(more)

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2013 Posts

2012 Posts

December 10, 2012
November 29, 2012
November 15, 2012
November 5, 2012
October 20, 2012
October 7, 2012
September 24, 2012
September 6, 2012
August 19, 2012
August 10, 2012
July 22, 2012
July 3, 2012
June 26, 2012
June 17, 2012
June 3, 2012
May 24, 2012
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April 29, 2012
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April 10, 2012
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March 29, 2012
March 26, 2012
March 21, 2012
March 15, 2012
March 9, 2012

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